Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
handjob tips. give me some.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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