Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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