There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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