butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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