If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
