I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize