; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize