The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
