I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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