Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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