11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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