She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
