Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize