It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
