and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I just want to make out with him forever
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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