p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
