how do flat chested girls get laid?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Randomize
