Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
