we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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