I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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