I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Randomize
