Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I need to calm my uterus...
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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