The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
he thought i was a dude.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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