C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
How does one acquire holy water?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
