So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
