Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
COCAINE IS GR8
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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