Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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