ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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