The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
