We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
