It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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