So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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