is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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