i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
a search helicopter?!
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
