So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm at about main and main street
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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