Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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