Small penises have feelings too.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
