Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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