I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize