Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
