Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
