I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Randomize
