you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize