I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize