windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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