Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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