my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
