There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
