my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
