I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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