Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
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