I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize